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What are some funny and smart quotes?

09.06.2025 17:12

What are some funny and smart quotes?

“Ah just like all women. If they’re not turning down your proposal of marriage, they”re accusing you of suspicious behavior in the lingerie changing room.”

“The human brain can only operate as fast as its slowest brain cells. Too much alcohol kills brain cells, especially the slower, weaker ones. So, regular consumption of beer eliminates the slower brain cells after you’ve had a few beers which will speed up your brain.”

“It’s a little known fact that pigs are the smartest animal. Scientists say that if pigs had thumbs and a language that they could be trained to do manual labor. They give you 20 to 30 years of loyal service and then at their retirement dinner, you can eat them.”

How can you determine which type of underwear to wear with different styles of clothing, such as dresses?

“Everyone in the Swiss Army owns a Swiss Army knife. That’s why no one messes with Switzerland.”

Few people had funnier or smarter quotes than Cliff Clavin from the TV show, Cheers.

“A Freudian slip is when you say one thing when you’re really thinking about a mother.”

What is the best phrase that sums up Tim Burton's Netflix Wednesday series cast? What is your unedited opinion about it?

“There is no rule against postal workers dating women. It just works out that way.”

They did a study between postal workers and chimpanze...

“It’s a little known fact that the tan became popular in the Bronze Age.”

I Discovered I Got Cheated On. But His Story About That Night Isn’t Adding Up. - Slate Magazine

My sister Tracy sent me these a little while ago. I thought I’d share them. Thanks Trace.